Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Still dying that you shit outside
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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