I heard we made out
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
