im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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