Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
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