We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
being pregnant is like rehab
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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