YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
