he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
