You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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