I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
