Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
