She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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