if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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