I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
worst night to have a conscience
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize