I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
My dick has a subreddit
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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