Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
