And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Randomize
