I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
