Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
