i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
