I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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