i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize
