My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
