Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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