i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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