I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
