and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
