One girl and one boy is just not enough.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
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