I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
You are a genius and a whore.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
