Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
