dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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