i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
