Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
