There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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