he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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