We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
