in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
