It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
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