do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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