Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
handjob tips. give me some.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
