margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
