therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
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he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
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Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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