i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a naked man in my car right now.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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