it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
