why didn't you poke me back
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
