Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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