I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize