There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
