I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
