I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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