this just has baby written all over it
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
